when you wish upon a star. stupid star.

Have you been to Cinderella's castle? It's quite spectacular at a distance. Maybe you've never actually stood before it - looking up at all it's magnificence - but maybe you've been to it in your mind. It actually - is much better there, really. I'm not trying to be a party pooper, But it's true.Nothing - no reality - can compare to what we have made of that castle in our mind.

I remember the first time I saw Cinderella's majestic, fairy tale home. I was eight. Remember the world at eight?  I could not wait to get to see inside of it with my own eyes and wander through its rooms and hallways and dungeons and towers. I wanted to see her bed, her kitchen, and fireplace. I had pictured it all a thousand times, and so the thought of seeing it for real made my heart race.

We climbed up the bride hill - that overlooks water - you know the one? And then stood in the golden painted archway with so many other people - who snapped pictures and talked loudly. What were they doing there? This was my moment! Not expected...right?

"Can we go in?" I asked.
"No - you don't GO in," my mother replied. She had tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Why? Why can't we go in? And why are you crying?"
"It's a restaurant in there. You have to have reservations to go in there." She wiped her tears from her cheeks. My father was taking her picture. She finished answering me. "It's Cinderella's castle. I have always wanted to be in Cinderella's castle. That's why I'm crying."

Yeah. I wanted to cry, too! THIS was it!?! And what was the deal with the reservations? Why couldn't we have reservations? I didn't ask anymore questions. I was sorely disappointed, and my mom seemed to be somewhere else in tears and a far-away look toward the paintings and bricks that had now really ticked me off.

THAT WAS IT!?!

How many times is the idea of something better to you than the reality? For instance - how 'bout motherhood? Are you laughing or gasping that I would even say such a thing? Laura Lewis! Don't you love being a mother? Of course I do! I love life with my God-given babes!!! But - BUT- BUT!!! THIS - is not how I imagined it. At all! Especially when they were newborns. Remember that? Or maybe you're in it...Praying for you, new Mama. Praying for you!!! Cuz..who tells you you're going to be up at 2 a.m. feeding a baby for months on end? NO ONE! Who tells you that they cry and you can't figure it out? ummm... NO ONE!  Who tells you that they will have sickness - and pain - and needs beyond your touch or ability to repair them? Aren't moms supposed to be able to fix everything? Yeah. No. Who prepares you for the heartache of  their blatant "NO"? Right in your face - "NO"...I guess that's more the toddler days - but still! No one tells you that tiny thing you could step on is going to rip your heart out and challenge you like nothing else in this world!  AND THEN!  who tells you that you can become this vile, nasty person that you have never seen or heard or realized in alllll your ever livin' days on this earth! AND you saw Mommy Dearest, right? Who told you that could be YOU?  Did ANYONE ever tell you that you would look in the mirror and ask - WHO AM I? ... Who is this person I am becoming in the midst of motherhood, because you have no idea. Yeah - no one.

I remember one friend - ONE - who said to me in my 9th month of pregnancy - while she held her 9 month old on her hip..."Keep that baby inside of you." But she didn't tell me why. And you know what - I was afraid to ask.

I guess - to everyone's defense - the truth is - HOW can anyone prepare you to come to grips with your own fantasy crashing around at  your feet. It's not going to be what you think it is - and no one else knows just REALLY what you have imagined THAT  picture to be... EXCEPT - our God. He knows our thoughts - He alone searches the heart - and He alone is the one who will speak love, and truth, and grace - into the reality that is our life. Jeremiah 17:10, "I alone search the heart and examine the mind to give everyman according to his ways, And according to the fruit of his doings." I do not see this truth of God in a negative light - anymore that is...As I learn the love that is our God...I see a Father - who knows what lessons He must bring to His child to shape a life - a heart - that is a reflection of His own image. Romans 8:27-28 makes that even more clear as I ponder it this morning... Hoping in God - who is our life - is where we will find an image to embrace and walk into.

"Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mid of the Spirit is, because He makes intersession for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."

Are you standing under the archway of Cinderella's castle? With tears streaming down your face - are you realizing, "THIS IS NOT WHAT I HOPED FOR." Does it feel like you have been sold a lie for what should have been a dream come true?

What are you going to do with those tears streaming down your face? Are you going to wipe them away and shove that pain deep down in your heart, so that you can chalk this up to another disappointment - another reason someone else has a better deal than you do... STOP IT! Stop right now...and I'm saying this in love - YOU ARE IN THE MIDST OF A POWERFUL LESSON. One that you best not ignore. How do I know? I'm with you!!! I'm standing right there with you! See me? Hey - how ya doin'? Here's a Kleenex. WE MUST pay close attention to our tears, and go to God's Word with them. That is the best cure for that heartache. We have incorrectly placed our hope in something that is not reality. Misappropriated HOPE is the reason for those tears - and we affect others with our sorrow... ( you know that little one lookin' at you saying, "Why are you crying, Mommy?")  LOVE for them makes a choice to fully examine our broken thinking - and seek God, our Daddy, to make it right. In the archway of Cinderella's castle - whatever that is for you - our God is standing - waiting for us to go to HIM - His Word - that is timeless - and exact - and healing - and precisely what He knew we would need to embrace our broken dream - and HIM - in the reality that is our day - today.

Remember that verse? I just shared it up a few paragraphs...IT ALLLL works together for our good. We don't have to be afraid that the dream just shattered. The dream cannot compare to what is going to be...because YES! GOD is just that good.

So stop reading this stupid blog - and go get your Bible...Read Psalm 27:14, Isaiah 40:28-29, Isaiah 41:10, Isaiah 25:4, James 1:3-4, and Hebrews 10:35-36...

Take hold of the TRUTH of God...and move into today knowing full well - your dream that you have cherished and protected and lived for - was not for nothing. It wasn't. Don't get all poo-poo about the fact you had this dream and it just popped!  This dream of yours - that God knew you had - it ...-LISTEN...and don't just listen - examine it - see if I'm right - IT was for a powerful lesson of LIFE - that GOD has been patiently waiting to show you - from the time your dreaming heart began to beat.

LOVE this Jesus life with you! Love it! Wish you'd tell me what you're learning, too. I always look to hear from you. LOVE!



 

running without growing weary?

So do you run?

I do. And that "I do" is definitely because of the "I do" that locked me into a covenant love with my triathlete husband. Long ago and far away I was one unhealthy dame. With smoke stained lungs I embraced running about 16 years ago. I never thought I would heal let alone enjoy a long run. I did heal - and I do love running. However - AND i do mean HOWEVER - when I have not run for awhile - even a few days - it is amazing how quickly what I had already accomplished in stamina and distance - diminishes. When I do not maintain - DAILY - stride and pace and distance - I quickly plummet in my running ability...which is not THAT great to begin with - but still - every little bit helps, right?

So where am I goin' with this? Let me tell ya...Tear jerker with our amazing God that I have to share with you - or I'll BURST! He is so so so so great, THIS GOD of ours! He is the one who heals, sustains, - and who is the banner under which we run!

I have begun to pursue a Master's degree in Theological studies. My husband and I have prayed long and hard over this pursuit. It's life changing. I had thought I would return to the English teaching realm. I even considered going for a PhD. in English Education - I met with my ol' professor and everything - but God continued to impress upon my heart that the desire He that has given me - is for His Word. MY HEART LONGING is for women to embrace His Word. The English classroom could never satisfy that God given ache. And no amount of money could either. So - we're investing in this degree and this call that God confirmed in some very cool ways - (another blog another day) - and we are trusting Him to flip the bill and sustain us along the way. (Our God owns the cattle on a thousand hills Psalm 50:10 - and He owns the hills too!)

I went for a run Tuesday morning, after spending some time with Jesus in His Word...I was processing all I was taking on with this degree- and all that I hoped to accomplish - and being wife, mom, our home, Vintage, Mom2Mom, working on our book (publisher waiting on ME!)... My greatest concern: can I do it?

Now mind you - in the midst of so much life goin' on this summer, I have not run a great deal. My distance and speed have suffered. Trying to increase both, I have felt like I was lumbering - but I continued to do intervals and press toward what I knew I had once been able to accomplish in my Asics. (If you're a runner - you know that you always wonder is the point of struggle is the graveyard gate for your running days. Ya know? I hate that thought!) So this run was going to be about maintaing speed ...not an interval run. I just wanted to see if I could pace consistently and feel stronger while doing it.

I started out and was initially pleased. I didn't feel so slow. I wasn't breathing as hard...NOTHING hurt. I pressed on. My mind left the road and went to the work that I would have to do that day. Reading. Paper. Cooking. Laundry. How would I write this paper? Thought upon thought. However as I ran, and noticed I wasn't lumbering - I kept interrupting my list of "to do's" with the realization of "I'm doing it! I'm running faster!" - and my heart was pumping steadily, not hard. I'm was not winded. I could go faster! I was amazed! I didn't want to think about it too much in case it would stop. You know that feeling? But I couldn't help it! I was actually smiling when I was running! I was almost giddy.

I thought to myself  about how I was actually afraid to keep going because it might start to hurt. I thought -maybe I should slow down and baby myself so I don't find out I really can't do it. That thought was quickly pummeled by my former hard core running partner/mentor - whispering in my memory "You'll be amazed by what your body really can do." So I kept it up...and as I was running at this pace, and in the midst of this distance and speed I heard a verse...over my breathing - over my own thoughts.

"They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31. Immediately my mind went from the run to the issue that God knows is on my heart.  He was directing my thoughts and I was listening. I can accomplish what He has trained me to do. It may scare me. I may hurt. But I can do it - running without growing weary, and walking when I can slow down - without passing out from the heart pounding pace I have just been at, and without going the distance ALONE. Everything that I had just considered about my physical run - was redefined spiritually for me in light of Isaiah 40:31.

I have not been in school for awhile. I will get the hang of it again. The reading and writing amounts - (distance) and the speed at which I do it - will improve as I continue in it - training and disciplining myself to keep at it daily. I will be able to accomplish what I have set my heart and mind to do - not because I love it, - even though I do! - but because this is the reason for the Healing, Provision and Banner over my life.

Tears. God teaches us so beautifully, doesn't He? He uses everything and anything in our day to speak to us. The beauty of it is that HIS WORD is attached to it. His truth pervades everything when we have hidden it in our hearts.

I won't be afraid of the work. I won't be afraid of the pace. I will be confident in my Coach - my Running Partner's Word to my soul.

We're going to make it. Hold on. We're going to make it. You are not alone.

How 'bout you? You clippin' at a pace that seems too hard, too fast. Talk to our Daddy. He will show you not only the path, and the direction to take on it - Psalm 119 -He'll give you the strength to finish the journey.
GAME ON!

LOVIN' this Jesus life with you! Lovin' it!!!

ahhh...manit'sgood!...
and now...you guessed it. I'm off to....rrrr...read.

Arrival Time

The Olympics fascinate me. Absolutely incredulous when I see the moment of triumph for these athletes who have endured so much and come so far! How 'bout the US women's gymnastic team? Come on with that! Spectacular!

Have you seen the Proctor and Gamble Olympic moms commercial? (click here!) Such a tear jerker for me!

Olympian mothers, having endure the years of training trials, alight upon the most significant athletic precipice her child will ever know.  The Olympic dream is what they have longed for and fought for. And as we watch these athletes, in awe and with great respect, we are welcomed into their dream come true. They have arrived at the 2012 Olympics.

Arrival - A MOMENT of MOMENTS is something we long for as we journey - whatever our course, and yet truly - we don't REALLY ever arrive. Did I just hear a bubble pop? Nah. I'm not telling you anything you don't already realize. Sure we reach a point on our destination, but once we get there, don't we have to move once again? Right? I mean, ARRIVING, as some of us speak of ARRIVING... does not insure rest. We never fully rest, no matter what place we reach. We must continue forward, or determine our downward climb, if that is our choice.   The "I have arrived" idea casts a vision for the end to struggle.. And it's wrong. Struggle will continue; it will just be a different one.

So - where am I goin' with all this???.I'm learning about patience. We who believe in THE PATIENT GOD are called to imitate Him, and frankly (love that word...I'll say it again) FRANKLY, I am not patient. If you are a momma like me, then maybe you have repeated a lesson on "love one another" this summer more often than you would have liked to. And if you are like me, your love and patience glow is not being reflected as brilliantly as it was the first day of vacation.

I was tenderly reminded as I studied patience this week , that God is patient with my babes, and He has been patient with me much longer than He has been patient with them. I have not arrived at who God knows I am able to be, and as much as I think I have learned or completed in crushing my old ways - I am still far from the image of Christ. Why do I expect my children to be more than I am capable of being?

The amazing idea for me, is that God is patient - in part - because He sees the end result with as much clarity and familiarity as the starting point. He knows - actually sees - AND - even better than that - IS - the beginning and the end. Revelation 22:12. He endures the training highs and lows with us and always sees the end result. He does not have to worry or wonder if we'll get there; cross his fingers, hope and pray, - HE SEES the moment of arrival! He authored it! IT WILL HAPPEN!

If our GOD can be patient then, for what He has purposed to be in us -  in our children - then shouldn't we be able to fully trust Him, and RELAX a bit in the learning? And I just don't mean relax in our own learning - I mean be patient in our children's learning, and be patient in our friend's learning!

 Consider with me.Hebrews 12:2 - "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame and sat down at the right hand of God." Jesus is the author and perfecter of faith. When we are frustrated with our babes, with our friends, with others in general - isn't our impatience then directed toward Christ? I mean, really? Who is the one who opens the eyes of the blind? Who is the one who gives us understanding? I know for certain it was not me - it is not EVER me - who brings to my mind and heart the understanding of God's Word.

As desperate as I am for my children to understand what it means to love one another well - to be patient with one another throughout the day,  they are also desperate for me to get it with them. Are they not? Absolutely - they just don't realize it - yet.(Patience, Babes. Momma's learning.) But God - our Faith Author does - and I am trusting Him to teach us all in such a way to endear our hearts to Him and to one another. Grateful to see His story unfolding! Grateful to know it will have a beautiful ending that will blow my mind.

So for today - I will look to Jesus - who endured so much more than I will EVER endure in today's sibling battles for the comfy chair, the remote, to go first...etc. etc. etc. JOY is assured. Our Patient God sees the moment of completion for all of us - and when I look to Him... I will see it too.

"LOOK I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to everyone according to what they have done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End." Revelation 22:12

And REAAALLY, when you think about this verse, - the impatience we experience is born out of the expectation for arrival that NO ONE will never know in this lifetime. Jesus is the only one who will ARRIVE, and in so doing - HE will bring all of us to completion. I can't wait to witness this with you! Can you even imagine? We can make it. See it with me - today - and every day. Remind me. The day is coming, and because it is we can live in patience for it - trusting our Patient God who promised it.

"Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer." Romans 12:12 - for us all.

HindSight

I wonder. If someone would have shown me this picture when I was 18, would I have lived differently?

I am teaching my children that their choices will follow them. Their choices not only affect them, but their choices will ultimately affect everyone who loves them - everyone they love. This power can bring beauty or this power can bring destruction. I know, ultimately, they will see the magnificence of God's Word in their lives. We all will. I just pray this realization will come through their obedience to His Word, and not their rejection of it.

Love protects others from sin. Now, I see that truth so clearly - even in this black and white image of my daughter in my arms - I see a thousand choices I made in my long ago yesterday that did not protect her, I see the redemption of God that secures her in spite of me, and I see the choices ahead of me tomorrow that will protect my child - and her children after her.

In a time when marriage is a joke - when people are a toss away based on a fleeting emotion such as happiness - my heart ACHES for the truth of happily ever after in our God. Oh please, oh please, with me - place your family picture before you daily. See deeply into the outlines of your faces, the scenery surrounding you - the smiles. BEYOND the image we behold is the security, the peace, THE LOVE, and the blessings of God through His Word.  He alone holds life together. He alone is our bond, and He alone teaches us what it is to love and be loved.  THIS understanding is our only hope.

With you, my friend, I choose God, and in doing so we choose AMAZING good for those in our lives that we love now - AND those we have yet to love. Can you imagine that? Is that not incredible, or what?!?!

What a gift! What a gift that God breathes insight into our limited understanding through the power of His living Word!

I read Proverbs 3 with my babes yesterday morning. I have their names written above it - and it's dated March 16th, 2009. I am not sure what was going on then, but that Proverb crossed my path and I chose to pray it and hope in it.  My son was 6 then; my daughter 8. Today - in 2012, they are well equipped with nouns and verbs and images that help them grasp on their own - to some degree - the RICH truth this Proverb holds.

For our marriages, for our children, for their children if God should be so willing to endure -
"Let love and faithfulness never leave you; Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart, and so find favor and high esteem in the sight of God and man." Proverbs 3:3-4

What will this look like in your life today?
In my life - I will correct my children with a smile on my face and truth from God on my tongue. Even though I could look at them with dagger eyes in a second and spew words they have never heard or want to hear.
 His Word - His Way and not my impatience. FOR GOODNESS SAKE! I have kids! Ya know what I'm saying? God let me have kids! You too!! Congratulations, by the way!  Look at those babes of yours!!! They're fabulous!!!  I will not forget today - no matter how they fight, or argue with me about what I am asking them to eat - or do, OR what they ask me to do for them in the middle of what I consider important...(like right now they are in the bathtub in their swimsuits and they called me upstairs to ask for gummy vitamins. Puddle on the floor, jets blowing loudly, toys surrounding them... REALLY? YES! Really! TODAY I will not forget the image of my life beautifully, messily, crazily, miraculously intertwined in theirs! I GET TO BE A MOM to these two amazingly unique babes - whom I have dreamed of from the time I could hold a dolly and call it a name...I think I liked the name Joey and Annabelle. Hmmm. How I went to Kamryn and Kaden - I don't know. ANYWAY...

TODAY I will greet my husband with love and not exasperation. September is coming! I'm going to make it!I will listen more than I talk (adult conversation wanted!), and I will seek to serve and not be served even though I am really, really sick of cooking. Pinterest to the rescue with ideas!

I will fight for the love that is my life now. I lack no good thing, and I will stay out of books, communications (facebook,email,texting) and images that communicate otherwise. I get to be in love with Kemper Lewis today! And if I should die today I want him to say, "Laura was the love of my life!" Who wouldn't want that for their husband? WHO wouldn't want that for their own love life? We want THE LOVE OF A LIFETIME kind of love - and how is that possible without the power of a LOVING GOD? I mean seriously - a workout video and perfume only go so far - ya know what I'm sayin'? I love this man God blessed me to do life with. I never want to cause him pain. Not ever. I will bring him good all the days of his life - and so today - that will be a hug around the neck, a smile just for him, frosted brownies and tacos! And yeah - I'll work out tomorrow. Today -...didn't get that done. It's okay, though... TOMORROW!!!You're with me, right?

We are so stinkin' rich, aren't we? Indeed. Praying we don't miss it - not one. tiny. glistening. toes, and fingers, curls, and tiny teeth, strong arms and loud footsteps down the hall - not one ounce.

"Happy is the man who finds wisdom, And the man who gains understanding. For her proceeds are better than the profits of silver, and her gain than fine gold." Proverbs 3:13-14

Hindsight.

And now - I'm going to clean the tub that my children so kindly have invited our dog to bathe in with them. Nice. I'll be sure to take pictures. And laugh.

I can if I want to.

The question is - why do I want to?

Ya know what I'm saying? The MOTIVE of my heart! Ugh!!! so not good so many times! And in that knee jerk frustration REACTION of my skin, and bone, and muscle I want to scream, "OK! BUT I CAN IF I REALLY WANT TO!"

Indeed. I can. But I don't. Not that I don't want to...I SO DO! But there's a part of me that would never fully enjoy that choice.

'"I have the right to do anything", you say - but not everything is beneficial.' I Corinthians 6:12

How amazing to me that you and I - who love Jesus - are indwelt by His Spirit that leads us! There's no law that is scripted out that says, "THOU SHALT NOT..." for every little thing that crosses my path or yours. And even if there were, we'd talk ourselves around the issue any way, wouldn't we? Sure we would! So then, there's no law list - there's the Spirit of the Living God thriving in our soul! Our Father - who whispers to us lovingly what is for our good - and what is not. Which freaks me out entirely! How can I type that without going, "What did I just say?" I couldn't type it, read it, believe it - were it not for a thousand countless moments of realizing it were true. Waking up to the voice of our God in my heart, directing me to live for Him, and not for my "I CAN IF I WANT TO" ideas, is incredulous - and yet the greatest reality I have ever known.

You know what I'm saying, right? And it's not even that the "I CAN IF I WANT TO" stuff is sin, so much as it is not for our - intimate relationship with God - good. I have these kind of directions for my own children, and so I relate to them with my God.

My children are mine. I love them, speak to them, guide them, instruct them, correct them, specifically and individually according to who they are as my own; how I know them, see them, hear them, understand them, protect them, provide for them, and hope for them. My relationship to them is unique - set apart - from other children...because they are mine, and because I know them. I do not speak to other children as I do my own - nor do I have the same expectations of other children. My children know what I have said to them, how I love them, and that we have a bond that cannot be broken. They respond to me because of that.

And in the same light - my relationship to my son - is different than my relation ship to my daughter. They are unique to me - and so is my love to them. Same momma - same heart - different expression of that heart to each child; - not in everything, but in some things... One likes to be hugged. The other likes to have a back scratch. One likes to spend time talking doing very little. The other likes to spend time with me doing lots, talking little. One likes to play. The other likes to do crafts. One has a physical aversion to dairy. The other does not. Both like ice cream. Yeah! I know! Different children - same momma seeking to love them well, so that they KNOW they are loved.

This is just a fumbling of words to express the intimacy of God's Spirit in us. Morning by morning we seek His Word - His guidance - His voice - His heart - His plans. He speaks to all of us, and although there are many directions that are consistent for each of us, by His instruction  - some directions are not. The hand has different instructions from the foot, the heart has different instruction from the brain, and the eye has different instruction from the ear. The same head is over all, but the instructions, guidance, provision, and the relationship to each is completely unique.

I wrap my heart around this picture to understand then what it means when I read, "You shall be named the priests of the Lord, (men) shall call you the servants of our God." Isaiah 61:1

I have to question? Me ,God? Is this a direction to me, to all of us who follow you? Or is this something specific to the tribe of Levi, per say - or to Jesus? WHO is this instruction given to? And what does that look like if it is to me?

The word "priest" takes me on a journey with God through His Word. And I land, most comfortably, with peace, and yet still - at full attention...on this verse "As you come to Him, the LIVING STONE, rejected by humand beings but chosen by God and precious to Him - you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ."
I Peter 2:4

We are called to be a royal priesthood. I am stirred and yet I need to be still. What is that to look like in me? I can't look to you for that answer, nor can you look to me. We must look to our God who is the One who calls some to build arks, others to move to a place they do not know; some to missions across the ocean, others to serve the widow next door. Each of us is directed by ONE God, so that together with One voice we can bring Him glory.

"I can if I want to" sounds very small and arrogant, doesn't it?  There is more to us than what we can do if we want to. There is the Living God in us - Who, although He CAN if He wants to a million times over - He did not - and still does not - and never will - so that we can know a new and better and living Way.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." Ephesians 2:10 "The temple of God is holy, which temple you are." I Cor. 3:17

Get over IT.

I hate that phrase."GET OVER IT" opposes the reason why I love my God so passionately. I cannot get over my past - even my present mistakes. I seek my God IN the midst of my mistakes. He speaks to me from His Word concerning every issue - every thought - every deed, and I hear Him. This is my eye to eye - heart to heart - one on one - with Jesus that endears me to my Savior. I do not get over that.

I get Luke 7:36-50, where a woman - who is described simply as a woman "who lived a sinful life", comes before Jesus crying. She is in the home of a Pharisee - a teacher of the Law - who would have condemned her without blinking, and yet she humbly moves past him to the feet of Jesus. There she cries and kisses his feet, washing them with her tears and drying them with her hair.

The Pharisee is disgusted. But Jesus rebukes him, lovingly. Jesus, instead of identifying her sin - he focuses on her adoration. He said to the indignant Pharisee - "Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I Entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell, you, her many sins have been forgiven - as her great love has shown."

Then Jesus said to her, "Your sins are forgiven...Your faith has saved you; go in peace." 


Jesus did not say, "Get over it." What he told her was she had been forgiven because of her faith in Him - and that she could have peace; - no more heartache.

Do you think she ever "got over" this encounter with her Savior? Yeahhhh - I'm thinkin' NO. You don't get over grace. You move - forward- in it with much love. I do not dwell on the past - but live intentionally for Jesus because of my past. My past does not leave me stymied - but rather catapults my understanding of God's love and favor each day. Pitfalls are avoided because of light and understanding. Are they not?

I woke with much JOY over God's truth that filled my heart on July 8th, 2012. Can I share it with you? My hope is that you will know this joy, too.

"Forget the former things: do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!" (CATAPULT!!)...I, even I am HE who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more."
Isaiah 43:18, 25

My heart to heart, eye to eye, one on one - with my God today - of all days; He speaks to me.He speaks to you. Do you hear Him? Oh please hear Him.

Happy Anniversary.

On July 7, 1962 my mom and dad were married. So today - would have been their 50th wedding anniversary. Despite the fact that a car accident interrupted his life with hers here on earth - I am still celebrating this anniversary. They never divorced, and I am certain - they never would have.

He loved her. She loved him. They committed to one another - to their marriage - no matter what.

Not so true of marriages today. Are you engaged? Are you married? Congratulations! You have a 40% chance of making it! I wouldn't even bet on those odds. Why do we give up on our commitment to love - until death  parts us?

When you look at a family that is broken...you see just that - lives shattered. What was so worth it? And what really confuses me - is that people divorce and remarry, like another life will be so much different, so much better...Really? Another marriage will defy the 40/60 odds? Because why??? Oh wait, because it isn't a human you're re-marrying??? 

Not so. Not so. People marry, divorce, remarry, divorce...and it goes on and on and sometimes still on.
I have one divorce in my past...and I am remarried, and yes my husband is human. AND I NEVER, EVER, NO. NOT. EVER. want to go through divorce - EVER - again.

Where is hope? Is there such a thing as a marriage that will last, and not even just last - but one that will thrive in love?

My hope is not in my spouse - but in Christ in my spouse. My husband fights for his relationship to our God - and he fights for his relationship with me. His love for me remains passionate - because his love for God is ferocious. He never settles for mediocrity. I am grateful, so much so - that I too, embrace this fight with him.

Happily ever after does not fall into place because you simply love one another. Happily ever after is a choice with strong intention and powerful determination - every single day, and YES that means even if you still love to kiss and hold hands. Cuz BigDaddy and I still do... ohyeahwedo!

In our marriages - (I'm rooting for you! with you!!! counting on Christ in you!!!) we will continue to fall in love when we let go of what we think that should look like, and pursue the unseen God. Loving one another is not a natural, pretty course - it's an obstacle course, a sweaty one at that! - and for as many mud pits that you and I may have to go through with our spouses - there will also be incredible pinnacles of beauty. The journey is exciting, challenging, and intense; filled with joy, laughter, tears, and sacrifice. Nothing compares to the beauty of this fight. Nothing. You know it's true! You feel it! Don't you? That is the hope of God in you!

If you are engaged, if you are married, if you are divorced and intend to be remarried...you  have been blessed to enter into a lasting covenant . Understanding this holy realm and KNOWING the God who is this bond with you - is critical to our love story. I Corinthians 13. Ephesians 5.

Wishing you every blessing in your marriage journey, and a happy anniversary - every single day.

It is a gift to be in love and to remain there.

"Truly our fellowships is with the Father and with His Son Jesus Christ." I John 1:3
"Everyone who has this hope in Him purifies himself, just as He is pure." I John 3:2
"None of us lives to himself, and no one dies to himself." Romans 14:7

Still falling!