Love. Who Gets it?

While I feel like I have so much to say, the more I read...the more I realize I have very little to add, and so much less I fully understand well enough to script my own love life, let alone an explanation of it on paper.

I'm reading The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis, and it makes my head and heart hurt. Who on earth can pen like this man? His thoughts are astoundingly challenging, and the way he writes is unparalleled. My reasons for reading Lewis are always to learn and to be challenged. I leave him very humbled and silent, yet still longing to process with my own fumbling words and hungry heart.

Recently my husband and I spoke at our college group about love, sex, and relationships. Quite a challenge to say the least - but truly our heartbeat for this generation. While preparing for this series, I learned one of the most powerful truths about love I have ever realized. I was deep in study - between John 14, 15, and I Corinthians 13, Genesis, Ruth, Galatians...I ran from Old Testament to the New Testament to hear from God on love. What I came away with was more than I had ever considered, and more than my heart was ready to bear.

Even though I have not finished hearing from C.S. Lewis on the matter, I am certain that what I have studied from him and other authors, at this point anyway, aligns with what God has spoken so beautifully - so subtly - and yet so very clearly to open hearts and minds.

The lesson is simply this: Love protects others from self.

I Corinthians 13 spins the reflection of self toward the image of God. For every way in which we could choose ourselves, there is a choice for others - which is ultimately the image of our God.

Love is patient. Love is kind. And so on... The opposite of any of these is a selfish course. Consider what you hate. You hate what opposes you, correct? How arrogant our hate, is it not? Hate is complete in its self direction.

Just consider the stance we take when we declare hate toward someone or something. YOU dare to oppose me?  Remember that heated argument with your spouse? Or better still, how about that moment when your child shouted "NO!" in your face. Remember that feeling that erupted in your gut? And how about the thoughts that raced through your mind? Isn't the root of all of that churning and burning simply SELF? Of course it is. True - there is righteous anger, but I doubt your memory drew for you such an image just now.

Like the pain of childbirth, so the course of love: self surrendered - in anguish - as we literally die to what we once were, so that someone else can live - in love. Romans 6 "Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him."

I'm trying so hard to understand this, and yet in my understanding I realize I really don't get love. God help us know you! Help us know love! "The unfolding of your word gives light. It gives understanding to the simple." Psalm 119:130

How amazing, then, that God should love the world! How much more vivid is His humility in coming to us as one of us! We are born opposed to God, and yet He loved us despite our defiance, and even GREATER still - He loves us in our defiance. What love!

 Love protects others from self. God so loved the world that He gave of Himself - His Son - for the Life of Spirit in Flesh, to protect us - from what we could never bear of Him - apart from Him..

"Abide in me, and I in you." John 15. Greater love has no one - than to lay down his life for his friends. Love does not consider self, but rather exists for the purpose of  life for others. The Triune God is love.

SELF-SEEKING. Baby, I was born THIS way: seeking self, and nurtured in a world of self seekers.

To Love is only of God, and to be able to love as God defines love is a gift of His Spirit. I Corinthians 13.Our Creator's image is a map embossed on our eternal souls, and His Son is the way to repair that image in our self driven flesh. Romans 3.

The road is narrow that leads to a love life, and few are those who find it. Matthew 7.

I'll end with a note from C.S. Lewis that still has me spinning in wonder. Join me, will you?

"Is it easy to love God?" asks an old author. "It is easy," he replies, "to those who do it." I have included two Graces under the word Charity. But God can give a third. He can awake in man, towards Himself, a super-natural Appreciative love. This is of all gifts the most to be desired. Here, not in our natural loves, nor even in ethics, lies the true centre of all human and angelic life. With this all things are possible. And with this, where a better book would begin, mine must end. I dare not proceed. God knows, not I, whether I have ever tasted this love. Perhaps I have only imagined the tasting. those like myself whose imagination far exceeds their obedience are subject to just penalty; we imagine conditions far higher than we have really reached. - The Four Loves -

Summer Joy

 Joy that summer brings:

1. flip flop tan lines
2. neighbors who come out to play
3. coffee outside in the morning
4. open window breezes
5. birds
6. sprinklers
7. the smell of sunscreen
8. rainbows
9. the drive in
10. fireflies
11. car wash in the driveway
12. chalk drawings
13. hide-n-seek in the dark
14. slides and swings
15.  long walks
16. looking for bats at night
17. ice cream cones
18. barbeque
19. blow up pool
20. flowers
21. green leaves
22. bumblebees
23. white baseball pants with red dirt stains
24. softball ribbons
25. fireworks
26. lemonade
26. homemade strawberry jam
27. water balloons
28. the blue heron
29. butterflies
30. swimming
31. sleep overs
32. camping
33. smores
34. sleeping in
35. staying up late
36. natural blonde hair
37.  the beach
38. the waterfront
39. freeze tag
40. book clubs

I could go on and on and on with JOY found in the summer time...with you.

Footprint

When you look back at your life, do you remember yourself in places that you wish you'd never gone? Are there relationship scars in your memory that you wish you could erase from your heart? "If only I would have..." are words that seer my thinking often when I turn to look at who I once was, who I hurt, and the places I went where I should have never been. Regret is a harsh teacher, Jesus is not.

In 14 years of college ministry at The Chapel at CrossPoint, I have spoken with countless young women who are burdened with the guilt of their mistakes...wrong decisions that cost them more than they could afford. Why don't we realize that what feels like the freedom to choose SELF is really a lifetime sentence of guilt? Nothing declares to me more boldly that we were created in the image of God, than the excruciating ache of despair in the midst of our self driven choices. In their tears, in their pain - I encourage every broken girl with the truth that God's image is imbedded in her. If that were not true, she would not sense His Spirit urging her to turn to Him.

"Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in hell, you are there...Search me God and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way of everlasting."
Psalm 139:7-9,23-24

The guilt I have felt is a gift of God's Spirit leading me to Himself. I do not look back with tears of regret, but tears of awe and wonder now overwhelm me because I realize the GREAT love that pursued me into the heights of my arrogance; down in  the depths of my selfish pursuits, and never let me go.

"Great is Thy Faithfulness, Oh God - My Father. Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I have needed Thy hand hath provided. All Thou has been Thou forever wilt be."

Vintage small groups are reading Psalm 119:97-112 today for our Bible study. We read independently - the same Scripture - all week long and then discuss what God has taught us when we get together after Vintage on Tuesday. I love being in step with these young women! God has used the gift of mentoring to spur me on in my relationship with Him. Their faces - their names on my heart - are a tool that God uses  to remind me - young hearts are hoping in Christ in me. I cannot see His face - but I can see theirs. I look to them, and I see He is present. God knows how we need one another to grow forward. I can't help but wonder where I would be without the young women God has placed in my life.

So this morning, as I read this Psalm, joy filled my heart. I had to write. I just had to.

"Oh how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long!" God has poured joy for His Word over the sorrow of my regret apart from Him.

"I gain understanding from your precepts; therefore I hate every wrong path." Passion for what will destroy me, keeps me running toward my God.

"Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." My parents no longer hold that lantern, as it was for me in my childhood. I have chosen to reach for the Word of God every day. 

"I have taken an oath and confirm it, that I will follow your righteous laws." This oath is to me more vital than the vows of my marriage, because it holds me in love to every relationship - everything that is dear to me, so that I will not cause pain.

"Your statutes are my heritage forever; they are the joy of my heart. My heart is set on keeping your decrees to the very end." This is my fight song. For Jesus who freely gave Himself that I might live a  Kingdom life  with ZEAL. Holy Spirit, you are IN ME!

Grateful this morning to inhale and exhale Truth with my Vintage Babes.

Choices are waiting to be made for King Jesus today - that need not be lost in self - but can be found - like a footprint on a lighted garden path.

Family Night

I am consumed with an aching heart for a friend of mine who is in the midst of fostering. Family is redefined for she and her husband, and their two young children.

The safe and private boundary of family has been interrupted.

Father's day included the fatherless.

Family night is no longer an event for US.  US strives to be one with THEM.

Family is not a protected unit, as we would understand protection; Family has become a UNIT OF GOD extended - interrupted - stretched - strained - and redefined daily.

Conflict is inevitable.

Little children struggle with  how to share, don't they?  In a foster home, a loud battle of  children's voices wages for a mother's attention while, silently, and without tears, this mother's heart is torn in four directions.

My tears will not stop.

Children change marriage. Nine months of preparation, gifts and baby books, do not equip a husband and a wife to love one another well in the midst of parenting. Husband and wife must learn to be married all over again when the dream of their own children comes true.

Foster children happen over night. The phone rings. The request is made. The door is opened, and little feet step over the threshold. Marriage is challenged again. Will love endure?

I grind my teeth.

Where does wisdom dwell?  The eye- the mind - the heart do not invoke wisdom. Her dwelling is not with men, but with our God.  What I think is good and right,  home and family -  is not.

"Do not be wise in your own eyes." Proverbs 3:7
"I will instruct you in the way of wisdom and lead you along straight paths." Proverbs 4:11
"Wisdom has built her house; she has set up its seven pillars." Proverbs 9:1
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." Provers 9:10

"Truly my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will never be shaken." Psalm 62:1-2

I am moved to pray these verses, but it is not enough to pray with words. Prayer is just as active as faith.

My stomach turns.

We will seek God for what He would have us do. The right thing is never what I think, and seldom what I want to do.

I went to bed angry. I am angry that children are abused and fatherless. The fatherless are everywhere, aren't they?  They are next door. They are across the street. They even have parents.

We must seek God to redefine family. He taught Israel. He will teach us. Family, to the Trinitarian God of the World, is not a protected UNIT. Family is to be extended, interrupted, stretched, strained and redefined daily.

"My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you." John 15:12

http://vimeo.com/44119459

The Buddy System Works

Hey! You're not trying to go it alone, are you? I have to ask - because...that is what I often try to do. I'm not quite sure if it's my pride, or if at times, I just don't realize I'm trying to do something alone and what I really need - is help..But - whatever the case, there are times when I try to "go it alone", and I strive terribly and then fail in the process.

So - I'm reaching out to you today with some encouragement. Please know you are not alone, nor are you meant to be.

First of all, God is with you;  He knows our frame. He knows what we are made of and capable of realizing and accomplishing in flesh.

 "Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them, for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you. ...The Lord, He is the one who goes before you. He will be with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed." Deuteronomy 31: 6, 8.

Strong encouragement to Moses, who must have thought - "HOW on earth can I accomplish what you are asking me to do???" God did not leave him without help. Moses and ...Aaron...right? Moses and...Joshua...God equipped His people with people - who, together, accomplished God's great purposes. CRAZY good stuff! Crazy good!

God did not create man to be alone in this life, He created man for relationship. You know I don't mean just marriage either, because although marriage is the ultimate earthly relationship, marriage is not everything in this life. Right? Where would we be without our friends? People who come alongside of us - even in our marriages, if you're married, - to help us grow, and serve God, and live out our faith; what a gift to our lives! You know what I'm sayin', right? Our marriage is stronger because of the godly women in our life - and the godly men in our husband's life who teach us, encourage us, and hold us accountable as we love one another. HUGE THANK YOU JESUS! Yes, I'm thanking God with you! So so good! So true and good!

And why would it be different in anything else? Scripture upon scripture I see the fortification of God's purposes through the buddy system. Consider this idea - story upon story. It's true. There is always someone or some people who come alongside of another person or people to accomplish what God is working out in them and through them. Are you thinkin' about it?

Adam and Eve
Noah and his family
Abraham and Sarah
Isaac and Rebekah
Jacob and Esau
Rahab and the spies from Israel
David and Jonathan

Should I go on? Because the Bible is filled not only with these examples, but instruction to support every one.

"Let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works." Hosea 10:24

What are you trying to accomplish all by yourself? A heart issue, a faith issue, a personal goal whether spiritual or physical, a challenge in your marriage, with your children, with your family, in your home, at your work, a project, a dream.... what are you doing all by yourself that you could accomplish if you would just seek the help of someone else...someone who will love you, encourage you, and come alongside you in your efforts...???

Who do you know that loves you? and better yet - will love God with you - and pray for you in your efforts while putting hands on to the project with you... Got a name? That's a gift from God my friend! And if you don't have a name yet - keep praying...you will. God is faithful to equip us with EVERYTHING that we need to live a godly life. II Peter 1!

Do you believe what I am telling you? I hope so! I have tried too many times to go it alone, and I know that it does not work...no matter what "it" is. If you don't believe me...Listen to our God. Be encouraged! You aren't a failure for not being able to do it alone - you are God's design...and that means you were never made to do anything alone. You can't remake that image. FATHERSONHOLYSPIRIT image in you. Forever. Not alone.

"The Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone." Genesis 2:18

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls. for he has no one to help him up."
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

"Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2

I'm with you! We need one another!

TweenTime

This is a message for the tweens in my life. I get to share GOD's love and TRUTH at my daughter's middle school group today. My heart overflows with excitement! Please pray with me that hearts grow to seek and serve the living God! I Thess. I:9! Here is the message:

I wonder how many times you have been asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
I love that you think about this and even dream about it with us some times. It's good to have dreams and goals that will help you achieve them. But I want to ask you something different, a question that I doubt you have been asked quite as much. You ready?

What do you want to be today? Do you know what you are and can be right now?

You are God's unique design. He planned you and purposed you, and yes, that means for right now. As children sometimes I think we focus too much on what we will be when we grow up, and in doing that we miss the power God has in us - for us - right now.

Consider King Josiah. Do you know about him? He became king of  Judah at the age of 8. In the 2 Book of Chronicles, the 34th chapter, Josiah's story is told. It says, "In the eighth year of his reign, while he was still young, he began to seek the God of his father David." The chapter goes on to tell how one of the priests in the temple found the book of the Law that God had given to Moses, and read it to Josiah. "When the king (Josiah) heard the words of the Law, he tore his robes" He was so upset! Can you imagine being so upset you tear your clothing? But Josiah didn't just get mad; he put his righteous anger to good use. This young king " ... removed all the detestable idols from all the territory belonging to the Israelites, and he had all who were present in Israel serve the lord their God. As long as he lived, they did not fail to follow the Lord, the God of their ancestors."

I have so much respect for this kid! He was young! He was called! He was appointed! And God gave Him everything He needed: Power, Influence, Leadership Skills, and The Word of God -  to live for God and lead others to live for God.

My favorite thing about this kid - he had NO IDEA that God was going to bring through him the KING of all KINGS. Josiah is listed in Matthew 1 as one of the members of Jesus earthly family. Check it out for yourself. I am not kidding you. Did God reward Josiah or what? Not only is his story told for you and I to know him and respect him, but he is linked for eternity to the Son of God.

Now - what about you? I know what you're thinking. "This is a Bible story, lady, and besides that - this is about a king. We're KIDS!"

I hear you, but being a young person does not limit God in you. God uses kids. He used Josiah as a child, David as a child, Mary was just a young girl, Isaac the son of Abraham was a child - and even as a baby, Jesus commanded the presence of angels, shepherds, and kings. A young boy gave Jesus his lunch and fed thousands! YOU can be used of God at any age. Do you believe it? You need to. I'll tell you why.

Doubt is one of the enemy's greatest weapons against us. Curled up in the branch of a tree, the ancient beguiler whispered to Eve, "Did God really say?..." DOUBT! planted in her heart, and so she did.
THAT being said -

1. First of all, you need to know your created purpose is directly connected to Jesus.
John 15:5-6 "I am the vine you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me, you can do NOTHING." - emphasis added by me - of course.

The wonder and amazement of the created thing is not JUST the thing itself. The thing itself is just a shell without the LIFE within it.

Consider a cardboard box. It's so much fun to create something out of this scrap of nothing. Kids make forts, and robots, boats and planes - just out of cardboard. But without the kid in it - what fun is it. What does it do. It's just a thing - with no life to it. And think about this, too...put the wrong thing in the cardboard box creation - and it just doesn't work the same...you know - like your dog, or your next door neighbor, Mr. Huberduberdingleschnocker. (names changed to protect the innocent)

The box is shaped into the creator's purpose, just like you. The size of it, shape, color - nothing external about that box determines the value of it. The only - ONLY - ONNNNLLLLYYYY thing that will ever determine the value of what is inside - is the one who gives it LIFE - just like YOU.

God created you for a purpose - and that purpose is directly connected to the LIFE that is JESUS in you.

2. Secondly, you are equipped with everything you need to serve God.

I Peter 4:10

2 Peter1:3

God did not sell you short on materials. You have what you need now to serve God RIGHT where HE has placed you.

Think about what you are good at. The abilities and talents God has given you are for you to use and CHOOSE to serve God. But I want you to understand something else. The life inside of you - that is given to you because YOU HAVE JESUS - is a part of our God. His Spirit - what He is good at - is in you. YES! I am not joking.

The Biblical term for having a part of God in you - is your "SPIRITUAL GIFT". It's like God took a part of Himself - His ability and wrapped it up in you. Is that crazy or what? I know! You wanna know some examples of this God talent you - YES YOU - may possess right now - and be really good at - right now???

Serving. Teaching. Giving. Healing. Mercy. Leadership (Josiah!). Knowledge. Faith. Wisdom.
These are only examples. You can read about more in Romans 12 and I Corinthians 13, and even there you won't find all of the things God can make us able to do by His Spirit. The possibilities are HUGE!

Any ideas about what you are good at? What God might have given you as a part of Himself for here on earth? Ask someone what they think. Others can sometimes identify our gifts from God better than we can.

The real question is...are you using this gift? Because...we alllll need you to! Not when you grow up either. We need you now! In your home; in your school, on the ball field, at the park, hanging out wherever you are...the part of God that He placed in you - with your physical talents and abilities - in the shape and size and design of YOU...is needed NOW.

3. Which brings me to my third point. You have been chosen and appointed with purpose.
Chosen means selected specifically, and appointed - well - this just seals the deal because that means the decision was made beforehand. Careful thought was given to the choice - of - you. ILOVETHAT! How do I know that? Good question! A disciple is a follower. Jesus had 12 disciples originally, but now - he has many disciples. We are his disciples. John 15 was written to the disciples, or followers, of Jesus. He said to us, "You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit - fruit that will last."

This isn't farming. This fruit is the stuff of God - the stuff that eternal life is made of. We are capable, because of Christ, of producing eternal things. YES! I know! I'm freaking out with you! Cause I thought I would only ever be good at making brownies! They're gone in minutes!

4. So what do we do with this great information? My next to last point... I know you're getting antsy, so I'll be quick. Here is point #4. Ask God to accomplish what He has given you to wish for. What do I mean by that? Well, Jesus said, you can ask for what you wish. John 15:7-8. But this doesn't mean an Ipad for you to play with or your own phone. This wish of ours - that God wants to bring about - is placed in us by God's Spirit too.NOTHING of God is for self. Everything of God is for others.

Jesus said, "If you remain in me and my words remain in you" - because remember, you always have a choice... - "...ask whatever you wish." So, God's Word in us will direct our wishing. For example: Reading about King Josiah - GIVE ME SOME OF THAT INFLUENCE! Right? King Josiah rocked for the kingdom of God. God's Word in our hearts - changes our desires. Which brings me to my very last point.

5. It's not about us. Serving others will glorify God and bring you JOY.

Our world is sooooo much about becoming and doing for self glory. Hard not to be! Stuff and popularity are powerful tools of the enemy. You, however, can overcome that lame duck power if you have God's Word in you and you want to overcome it. Remember - it's a choice.

Jesus said, "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love, just as I have kept my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one's life for one's friends." John 15:9-13

Your created purpose is directly connected to Jesus. What Jesus did for us - He wants you and I to do for others. He changed the WORLD! And He's still doing it - by His Spirit - and through His disciples that choose Him.

Think about it. The way God has made you - the place He has set you down on earth - your chosen and appointed life and time in 2012...What are you going to do with it?

Don't think small. Think great! God didn't say don't ask for great things. He said nothing is greater than laying your life down for your friends. Ask Him to show you how you can do this very great thing today.

We are all waiting and hoping on Christ - IN YOU.
LOVE!

stay at home mom

You gave me a job.
I gave it back.
Because you gave me a child.
Twice.
I loved them more.
You have always
 provided all we need
And more.
I will pursue nothing
without you.

You are the Giver.
My hands are open.
My heart is
Longing for you,
and no vain pursuit will satisfy.

Lord, what would you have me do?
The laundry is done.
Cupboards are full.
The house is clean,
quiet
empty for hours
of the day.

Fills these hands.
Please.
Give me good work to do.
Work that will last beyond
books on shelves no longer studied,
and recylcled
papers
written on - long ago,
now stale with
old ideas.

You are the Giver.
Of every good and perfect
Gift.
I wait for you.
Because you have never
left me
unsatisfied.